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20. A lesson on stopping the ‘what-if’s’ from taking over my life!

What if?A lesson on stopping the ‘what-if’s’ from taking over my life!

The moving day is in 4 days!

Or is it? Everyone in the chain was supposed to exchange last week but that hasn’t happened yet. To my best knowledge I think that all parties have signed the necessary paperwork, but that’s it.

To make matters more wobbly, the family buying our house received a call from their movers telling them that they’re short-staffed and might not be able to move them on ‘move day.’

What the heck?

Is it going to be drama right up until everything takes place? In my mind, the worst-case scenario is that we move a day or two late. In reflection, that’s not a bad ‘worst-case’ to have.

Saying that, however, one day late is possible. If it’s two we’ll have to re-jiggle a variety of things. Unfortunately there was a death in the family and we now have a funeral to attend on Friday.

So the plan is this: move on Wednesday, leave for the funeral on Friday, get a hotel and stay in the area until Sunday and then fly to Palma Mallorca to go buy our boat. The funeral is in the same area as the airport we’re leaving from, so rather than drive a 4-hour round trip on Friday, we can simply drive there and hang out until Sunday. Hopefully we can also spend some quality time with family.

In my heart, I know that we’re going to get the boat and everything is going to take place.

In my head, however, I’m still allowing disempowering thoughts to seep in, like ‘what if this all falls apart?’ and ‘what if things don’t work out?’

And because the ‘what if’s’ have seeped in they’re extending to other areas of my life. They’re even extending our sell up and sail plans. I’ve heard myself think, ‘what if I don’t like sailing around the world?’ and ‘what if I’m not happy on our boat?’ and down the spiral goes.

Every day hubby and I look at pictures of our new boat.

We share our stories with friends. I often visualize myself soaking up the sun and enjoying a swim in the sea. I imagine all the dolphins that will join us on the voyage and the lovely people we’ll meet around the world. I see smiling faces and my face seems to have the largest smile. I can almost taste the lovely foods – a flash of India just came into my head. Oh-my-gosh…one day in my future I might moor up in India and eat real Indian food. Now that’s exciting.

When I get my mind to focus on the trip I instantly start to feel different.

My shoulders seem to ease, a smile comes across my face and I feel excitement boil up.

It just seems that the world I’m in now is so different than the world I’ll be in soon. I wonder if this whole transition is so stressful so to help me better enjoy my new life? If you experience one extreme you’re more apt to experience the opposite – yes? I’m not sure. I can’t help but feel that if I’m stressed now, I’ll be stressed later.

What you focus on creates how you feel.

The one lesson I am truly bedding into my body and soul, however, is that what you focus on creates how you feel. If you focus on all the scary ‘what if’s’ you’ll most definitely feel stressed. If, however, you consciously choose to focus on the exciting opportunities you’re whole mind/body change for the better.

The key is to make sure you’re conscious of what you’re focusing on and if it’s not productive, decide to change your focus. Sounds easy but it isn’t if you’re not watching your thoughts or noticing your feelings of stress.

The easiest way to ‘get it’ is to realize that if you don’t feel good, your focus in going in the wrong direction. Decided to change your focus for the better and your mind/body will fall in line.

And in my case, I just have to keep reminding myself of this quite often! Heck – if nothing else I’ll get much better at falling in a rut only to quickly realize it and get myself out.

Next Chapter: 21. Serious issue – we can’t take our yacht to Barcelona, Spain as planned – YIKES!

Previous Chapter: 19. Life has slowed way down – is it the calm before the storm?

Or…if you’d like to carry on reading all about our journey from selling up and sailing away, you can purchase my book, ‘Changing Lifestyles – Trading the Rat Race in For A Sail Around The World,’ 

Changing LifestylesREADER REVIEW
"I finished your book this week and absolutely loved it! It was great to read about your early days in many places we also sailed. I loved the way you combined your blogs/real life scenarios with advise on boat maintenance, letting go of your previous life and about your honestly throughout. I enjoy your style of writing Kim, and I loved the little Sienna quotes." Jayne Eames-Thornton, s/v Delphinus
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Comments

  1. Tom Scott says

    June 9, 2014 at 4:26 pm

    Hello, I happened apon your blog and began reading it from the begining. You are really having the adventure of a life time. After reading about “What if’s” I wanted to make a comment. My wife and I use “what if’s”, almost like a game. After we make a decision we discuss all the what if’s that might come up to derail our plans. It seems to help us be prepaired with a solutions. We also don’t get upset if a problem pops up. Because 9 out of 10 times we have already talked about it before hand. My name for problem solving is the ‘spagetti” method.. Think of throwing a pot of cooked spagetti aginist a wall. Some peice will stick. By throwing out every idea no matter the logic the solution will stick. Maybe not the whole solution but the begining of one and parts of others. Don’t forget if you fix your #1 problem today #2 moves in to take it’s place. Have fun & enjoy.

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Changing Lifestyles: Trading in the Rat Race for a Sail Around The World (my book). Chapters:

  • 1. That’s it – I’m selling everything and sailing around the world!

  • 2. Oh crap – Are we healthy enough to sail around the world?

  • 3. House sold, price on yacht almost negotiated – just need temporary housing now!

  • 4. Before I sell up and sail away I need to clean out my closet (in many ways)

  • 5. Getting the boat of our dreams – will we or won’t we?

  • 6. Negotiations 56 Oyster Yacht have finished but not without massive pain

  • 7. Everything was going well until we got this phone call…

  • 8. Quick, quick – we need to sell our current boat. We need a place to live. We need to…

  • 9. My new normal and dealing with giving up all our possessions

  • 10. Going from sailing Selene to selling Selene so we could afford to buy our 56′

  • 11. Sea trials and the survey – the night before we meet our dream yacht

  • 12. Hours before we meet our new yacht…our new home!

  • 13. Sea trials on the Oyster 56 were a success – we love her!

  • 14. Getting a yacht lifted out for a Marine Survey

  • Extra: Sell Up and Sail Away Video – Sea Trails & Survey

  • 15. After sea trials and the survey I ran a marathon (accidentally)

  • 16. What does homeschooling, the paleo diet, writing, and photography have to do with sailing?

  • 17. I’m so freaking frustrated – the world is broken

  • 18. Saying goodbye to my old routines and old lifestyle

  • 19. Life has slowed way down – is it the calm before the storm?

  • 20. A lesson on stopping the ‘what-if’s’ from taking over my life!

  • 21. Serious issue – we can’t take our yacht to Barcelona, Spain as planned – YIKES!

  • Extra: Sell Up and Sail Away Video 2 – Our thoughts, feelings and move day!

  • 22. The day before we purchase our 56′ Oyster

  • 23. My first trip on our new yacht – Dolphins included!

  • 24. Feeling excited, sick, and in awe are not mutually exclusive when sailing on the seas

  • 25.Things got worse

  • Extra: Sell Up and Sail Away Video 3 – Palma Mallorca to Gibraltar

  • 26. Sell up and sail away preparations – we successfully took possession of your new yacht

  • 27. Preparation for our around the world sailing trip couldn’t get more exciting!

  • 28. Two months to go before we set sail for our world adventure

  • 29. We got a gun, but not the kind you’re probably thinking of

  • 30. The contrast of sailing around the world and cancer

  • Extra: The reason I decided to sell up and sail away (video)

  • 31. Courses, becoming British, putting our remaining possessions on a pallet and what else?

  • Extra. No – we did not win the lottery!

  • 32. Less than 3 weeks to go before we sail off into the sunset

  • 33. Ten days to go before we set sail on our grand adventure

  • 34. Will this sailing adventure turn me into a dreadlocked, pot smoking, whale saver?

  • 35. In 2 days we will set sail around the world sailing adventure

  • 36. Leaving Gosport England today to start on our around the world sailing adventure

  • 37. Life aboard our new yacht with the BBC, Daily Mail and Times in tow

  • 38. Feeling amazing, scared, overwhelmed and useless

  • 39. Sailing Gibraltar To Malta

  • 40. I’m honoured to introduce Loryn Bennett – Britican’s Chef

  • 41. I still can’t even believe this is happening

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