What makes someone want to say ‘screw it, I’m trading my life in for a sail around the world?’ In the following video you’ll hear what made my husband and I decided to quite our ‘normal’ life, leave our financially secure set-up and head out into the unknown.
If we can do it, so can you!
Directly below you’ll find our video made over three years and 18,500 miles after we set sail. After the video, you’ll be able to read my thoughts/feelings that I jotted down BEFORE we left.
Why we sold up and sailed away video
October 7th 2013 – before we sold the house, purchased the boat and left land
Have you ever had a situation when things get so bad that you just can’t handle them anymore? You’ve toyed with making a change for years, but never did anything and then one day you feel as if you’re going to burst if something doesn’t change?
Well, I’ve been living like that for years. And ironically, I’ve made massive changes to my life, yet they haven’t been enough. Let me give you a very quick update on where I was, where I am now and how I’m finally saying screw-it. (Keep reading to find out why we sold up and sailed away – perhaps you currently feel similar to how I felt back before the big decision?!)
First I quit my job
In 2011 I quit my job because I was frustrated, exhausted, bored, unchallenged and seriously lacking fulfillment. Furthermore, my health was declining – mentally and physically. Quitting my job was a bit difficult as I owned 50% of the company I worked for, but that’s another story.
Needless to say, I quit my job and decided to find out how to live a more enjoyable journey. Up until then I had controlled, forced, cajoled, and pushed my way through life. If I wanted something I’d go get it regardless to whether the journey or the final destination was enjoyable.
If the journey isn’t good then the destination won’t be rewarding either
Thankfully I woke up and realized that if the journey isn’t good then the destination won’t be rewarding either. This whole idea of working hard until your 65 and then you can relax is a total joke. Everyone I’ve met that worked hard either dies once they retire or loses their sense of purpose and falls into deep depression. And then they wonder why they spent years being miserable!
Not for me. No way. I took a jump off the end of the rat race pier. Are you wondering what happened once I did?
I quit the rat race and then found true happiness – errrrr, not really!
Well, I’d love to say that my life become fun, enjoyable and full of great experiences but it didn’t. Just because you change the scenery YOU don’t change. The grass is not greener anywhere – no matter how hard you look! I thought that if I removed the thing that made me so miserable, my job, that I’d instantly be happy. Not the case.
It took a while, but I eventually realized that I had to change me. I had to change what I thought about me, my life, the world and my relationship with me, my life and the world. What a growth spurt. An emotional journey that lead to some low lows and some high highs. That’s another story too.
I want fulfillment with my life!
After quite some time, I eventually leveled out a bit. I understood more about who I was, what I wanted and how I wanted to go forward through the rest of my life. My main objective was to enjoy the journey – to increase my overall fulfillment of life.
Thankfully, I’ve made quite a bit of progress but it seems like the more I learn about me, the more I realize that I’m not in the right place doing the right things.
Doing the right things for the wrong reasons?
I started my company in 2004 because I wanted to get rich and I also wanted to be a writer. Rather than write a book or take up journalism I instead started my own company. I was told throughout school that I was a good writer but had no clue about grammar or spelling. I mistakenly thought that I could never be a writer. Starting my own company would allow me to write because I’d be the one who ‘okays’ it. Funny way of thinking – isn’t it?
So I end up starting a finance company. Did I mention that I’m not good a math either and as far as finance is concerned I’m really not interested in it (other than having lots of money). So – I go way out of my way to have the ability to write. After 8 years, I find myself burned out and miserable. On the positive side, the company enabled me to write everything – the website, promotional materials, guides and I even published quite a few books! That led to me writing for many popular magazines. By the time I left I’d been published in over 50 publications including the NY Times, Times and loads of magazines.
By now, I figured it all out – errrr, not really!
So you’d think that I’d quite my job and then become a writer – yes? No. I’m not a writer. I can’t really write that well…but I do love writing! So once I left my job I started a couple blogs (for fun) and then offered management consultancy and started a couple more companies. I bombed at the consultancy – couldn’t handle it. It was too much like working at my company. As for the companies I started, they were and still are interesting but there’s no real challenge. I’ve realized that just because you’re good at something doesn’t mean that you need to do it for the rest of your life.
For the past 2 years I’ve bumbled around doing this and that. For the most part, I’ve really worked on getting myself into a better place. I’ve learned so much about me. And I’ve learned to like who I am. Previously I wouldn’t even look in the mirror at myself – I was too ugly and unworthy.
Here comes the screw it part (almost)!
So, as the title suggests, I’ve finally said screw it. The pain has now become too much for me to bare. I’ve lived a life I thought I was suppose to live based on my past conditioning and now that I’ve taken time out to figure out who I am it’s time to really change.
What about sailing? Where’s that fit in?
Just a little bit more background. For fun, I love to sail. I’m not the best sailor in the world and I do get sea sick. However, for the past 15 years I’ve going on a sailing holiday most years and every time we’ve had to return home I’ve cried. In 2011 we purchased a Moody 346 yacht and I would rather be on that then doing anything else.
Stating that, sailing is fun – it’s a hobby. My dream has been to sail around the world but it’s only a dream. It’s what you tell people when they ask you what you’d do if you won the lottery. It’s not something you actually ever do – is it?
SCREW IT, SCREW IT, SCREW IT!!!
So this is where the screw it comes in. For all my life I wanted to be a writer and for a huge chunk of my life, I’ve enjoyed sailing. I’m not attached to my house (or the things in it), I think the amount of commercialism in the world is distracting us from what’s most important and I’m craving homemade food from local sources. So…logically, what should I do?
Yep – I’m selling everything I have, buying the biggest yacht I can afford and setting sail with my husband and 3 year old daughter. And although I’m not a writer, I’m going to write. I’m going to write about my adventures, my doubts, my fears, my successes, my learning lessons and even some practical tips for those that want to say ‘screw-it’ too. YIKES. I’m scared but excited but scared but excited.
I’m very scared. I’m very excited….
To read about the Captain (my husband) our Deck hand (my daughter) and me, go to The Crew.
The next article is: That’s it – I’m selling everything and sailing around the world!
Or…if you’d like to carry on reading all about our journey from selling up and sailing away, you can purchase my book, ‘Changing Lifestyles – Trading the Rat Race in For A Sail Around The World,’ (click the link to find out more…) The book will take you step by step through the blog articles. You can grab a beer, pour yourself a glass of wine or get a nice coffee/tea and curl up with a book or digital version to enjoy all in one go. Otherwise, navigating around to 300 articles can become quite a task!
You ARE a writer. Don’t ever doubt yourself. I’m looking forward to reading about your journey 🙂
Yes Lesley – I AM A WRITER! WOOOO WOOOO WOOO. Thank you for your support. Big smiles 🙂
I am so glad that I got to meet you Kim! I love hearing about all of your plans and can’t wait to see where your adventures take you. I am a great believer of ‘feel the fear and do it anyway’. Excited and scared is a heady combination. Enjoy, you deserve it!
Thank you for your supportive words Anita. I am definitely feeling the fear and doing it anyway!!! Big smiles 🙂
Congratulations on your decision to buy Pearl Fisher! My name is Justin Danby and I was the very first Captain when she was brand new.
The owner was a London based banker, very nice family with 2 boys.
I ran Pearl Fisher for over 2 years and even stayed with her with the Australian based guy for a while who bought her in the summer of 2005.
We spent the winters in the Caribbean chartering and owner use and summers all over the Med. We also had a full time cook/mate called Emma.
Since then I have skippered an Oyster 651 and an Oyster 80.
Have fun! Regards Justin
You are a Writer and I can’t wait to follow the wonderful adventures you have! I have only ever done summers, on sailboats-and that has given me many wonderful stories. You will never regret the families memories–to quote my mom “The years when your children are little go by so quickly, but boy, are the afternoons long”
Thank you so much for your comments! You’re so right – we have many wonderful stories to come!!!
About nine months behind you. I “retire” in 47 days at age 46. Technically that is April fools day, but it isn’t a joke. I look forward to hearing more from you. Perhaps we can cross paths someday.
Hey Kevin – that’s so exciting! Yipppie!! I’m sure we’ll cross paths at some point. What are your plans? Where are you starting from? Do you have a boat already? I bet you can’t wait. Big smiles
Circumnavigation. Perhaps at an extraordinarily slow pace. For now the boat is an Ericson 26 and we should launch from Charleston SC this summer. It may take us awhile to move off the east coast. We plan to sail the boat we have a fair amount before making any decisions about The Next Boat. It also allows us to get started now.
Hey Kevin! I think an extraordinarily slow pace sounds great. We keep telling people that it will take us 3 – 5 years but perhaps it might take 10! Who knows. I bet it’s hard to envision your plans with all this snow you’re getting hit with (I assume SC is being hit too?). I can’t tell you how much I crave the sea and the sun! Thank you for sharing 🙂
Hey Kim,
You should check out http://www.nineofcups.com/ They are about to hit 13 years and have the entire Indian Ocean left to tie the knot. Like us they consider Denver CO to be their hometown.
We are currently in Charlotte NC, The boat is on Lake Norman (The Inland Sea to old timers). We launch from Charleston because it is straight down the interstate from here, easier to move the boat. Also the proximity of several environmental and cultural treasures that are under threat that my partner Natalie can create art installations in response to.
Yes, we have lots of snow right now. Today is bright and sunny and dreaming of spring. I try to keep firmly in mind that “Sailors have intentions, not plans” The ocean/nature is bigger than you are, you can’t fight her, you have to work with her.
I am very excited to follow your adventures.
-Kevin & Natalie.
Hey Kevin & Natalie! Thanks for the link to Nine of Cups – they also have a great blog website at: http://justalittlefurther.com. My brother recently moved to Cary NC so I’ve been there a couple times. I haven’t made it to Charlotte yet, but I will one of these days. May I ask what an ‘art installation’ is? Sounds interesting. I love that sailors have intentions and not plans – that’s so true! What a great line. For the next three days I have nothing in my schedule so hopefully I’ll be able to update my website more. I have 40 articles about what we’ve gone through thus far…and we haven’t even started on our trip. Hehehe. Stay warm 🙂
We are four years behind you……My wife and I are following you…..you lead…..we’ll follow!
Hey Greg – great to hear from you! Please let me know if there’s anything in particular that I can write about for you! Can’t wait to meet up in the future so we can swap stories! Big smiles
Hi Kim,
Sorry for the long response time but I was waiting to be able to share this with you: http://www.defineearthprojects.com/g-mari-flore-damnatis/
These images are from Natalie’s most recent Artist’s Residency. She was in Seaside Florida for the month of Febuary. The nearby areas hold about a third of the world’s dune lakes, a unique ecosystem. Natalie can answer any questions you might have. I hope things are going well for you.
Thanks for this Kevin! I’m currently up to my eyes in packing (we leave in 2 days) so I can’t give it my undivided attention right now. I’ll check out Natalie’s website as soon as I get on the boat and get settled. Big smiles
Hi Kim
We are a bit behind you.I have sold the house and bought the boat.
Hopefully we will meet up with you some where
James
….like many others right behind you also. Retired 6 months ago at 56, remodeled the house, fixed up the boat, now both are for sale…along with one car and everything else. Currently deciding on the right boat for us. Sea of Cortez bound to get our cruising legs, then…who knows. I’m so excited about doing this I can barely sleep. Take care.
Thank you for commenting Steve! You’re definitely doing the right thing… We have absolutely no regrets and life keeps getting better and better! We’ll see you soon on the seas 🙂
Made me smile;) Malta and Sicily are not too far apart… maybe our Moody path’s will cross before too long!?! x
I’m sure we’ll meet soon Dini…I just wish I was near you now. I could definitely use some Yoga in my life right now! Big smiles 🙂
Thank you for sharing. I enjoyed the way you are writing. if you sail towards Turkish coast feel free to contact. .my boat is in yalova marina istanbul. I sail down aegean for summer.
best wishes for the crew. aydın
I could not agree more – the idea of working until you are 65 and totally tried to be able to enjoy your freedom is a joke for me too! I do not want that at all, I love traveling but I do not want to travel all the time, not having a one place to come back to. It is so difficult to say what would make us happy, usually we think that the things we do not have now are the once we need, but this might not be a case. Some people are born to be happy living a normal life, some are born to go wild. The journey must bring the same amount of joy or even more that the destination. I question my life and this is a start – I do not see myself working until I am 65, I know this is not going to happen as having a choice between going crazy and extremely unhappy and risking it all I will risk it all. So our plan is in motion now, few years needed to finally escape. I am feeling much much happier now than ever before knowing that what we want (and we are lucky finally knowing what we want) is going to happen!
I’v stumbled into your blog because I’m at the eve to move to Malta with my sail boat. I’ve got a kind of life untill now which made me to make consisnent changes in my life. In 2013 I’ve moved to Calabria which is a very nice place to live in, there I’ve met my new “love of my life” and working as sail instructor to the local sailing club (www.soveratovela.it) but unfortunately in wintertime there are not jobs available and the risk is to starve. Since to winters I’m moving abroad (mainly UK) where is possible to make good money by driving busses but where the quality of the life is very low (not social, bad weather etc…) . I’m always dreaming my boat which is moored in south of Italy. Now I decided to move to the south Europe. More likely (but it’s not said!) I will continue to drive busses there bu not more than 40 hours a week , for much less money than here but enjoing the better quality of life . More ikely my “love” is joining me there, here she willl never come. I’m foreseeing to leave the italian coast at the beginning of September to Malta. I will live in my boat and as soon as I can sell my house which is in north of Italy I will buy a biger one…..I will joint you by writing my past and actual adventures and style of life in a blog I will open as soon as I will leave Italy maybe forever…..may the wind always be at your back. Sail.Instrucror (Riky)
what do you do for an address? There are a lot of things that still require this.
Hey Barry, in the UK we use my father-in-laws address and in the US you can purchase an address where a company forwards all your ‘good’ mail to you where ever you are. Smiles, Kim
Kim,
I am so thankful I ran across your blog. We are finally taking the leap and to hear your voice through your words back in 2013, made me realize everything I am feeling is pretty normal. I look forward to reading about your journey over the last couple years and am eager to get on our way. I know we will have questions and Kim, I hope our paths cross one day. (The website attached to this, well lets just say, I haven’t had the nerve to launch yet. I have been keeping it as a type of “journal” until I am comfortable. Although, your words helped and actually are so relatable they may be the push I needed to hit that “post” button. I am guessing, being out of my comfort zone, is going to be a place I should get familiar with from here on out. 🙂 )
Hey Heather!!! Push ‘post’… and keep pushing post 🙂 It gets easier and easier. I look forward to meeting you soon 🙂
We are still in the planning stages at this point. Some days I still think we are insane to even consider it. I retired from the Marines 2 years ago and my husband will do the same in 3 more years. Then we plan to sell our house and pack up our 5 year old little girl and pull anchor. We will have two kids in college at that time and that makes it harder to explain to people. The looks we get are pretty interesting to say the least. I will be 42 when we depart. Such an adventure we will all have!
Thank you for sharing Jessica! There are quite a few of us in our 40’s with kids in University or on the boat. Once you get out and going you’ll realize that all the nay-sayers are the crazy ones. I look forward to seeing you on the sea 🙂